Friday, August 21, 2009

Worst List Ever...



So...over the past 5 days, Pitchforkmedia released their Top 500 songs spanning 2000-2009. This is hands down the worst list they have ever released in their 14 year existence.

A) Last I checked, 2009 is not over yet. Did they just decide that all the good songs that will come out in 2009 have already come out?!

B) They obviously chose the more obscure songs from great, decade-defining albums in an attempt to seem "indie-sterious"/more informed than you or I. Example: #416 Jens Lenkman - "The Opposite of Hallelujah" from 'Night Falls Over Kortedala', which contains the obviously superior track "A Postcard to Nina". This type of situation happened quite often throughout the 500 songs.

C) I have no clue how they came to the conclusion that these were the defining songs from 2000 to September of 2009, but there were some seriously jaw-dropping moments for me:

495: Weezer - "Islands in the Sun"
426: Bob Dylan - "Mississipi"
325: Sean Paul - "Like Glue"
322: Wu-Tang Clan - "Uzi (Pinky Ring)"
303: Mystikal - "Shake Ya Ass"
296: Johnny Cash - "The Man Comes Around"
291: Missy Elliott - "Pass That Dutch"
270: Damian Marley - "Welcome to Jamrock"
263: Coldplay - "Yellow"
258: Rachel Stevens - "Some Girls"
246: Lupe Fiasco - "Kick Push"
232: Destiny's Child - "Jumpin' Jumpin"
222: Three-6-Mafia - "Sippin' on Some Syrup"
219: Lil' Mama - "Lip Gloss"
194: David Banner - "Cadillac on 22's"
190: Panjabi MC - "Mundian to Bach Ké (Feat. Jay-Z)"
183: Beyonce - "Irreplaceable"
180: Gwen Stefani - "Hollaback Girl"
175: Usher - "Yeah (Feat. Ludacris & Lil' Jon)"
165: Jimmy Eat World - "The Middle"
160: 50 Cent - "In Da Club"
141: Britney Spears - "Toxic"
138: D'Angelo - "(Untitled) How Does It Feel?"
131: Destiny's Child - "Say My Name"
115: Dirty Projectors - "Stillness is the Move"
113: Kelis - "Milkshake"
111: Aaliyah - "We Need a Resolution"
77: Three-6-Mafia - "Stay Fly"
71: Kanye West - "Gone (Feat. Consequence & Cam'ron)"
32: Amerie - "1 Thing"
21: Kelly Clarkson - "Since U Been Gone"
19: R. Kelly - "Ignition (Remix)"
16: The Rapture - "House of Jealous Lovers"
12: OutKast - "Hey Ya!"
11: Gnarls Barkley - "Crazy"
7: Missy Elliott - "Get Ur Freak On"
4: Beyonce - "Crazy in Love (Feat. Jay-Z)"
1: OutKast - "B.O.B."

like...seriously, WHAT THE FUCK was that?!

Who came up with this shit?!

Look for my Top 250 (maybe more) songs of 2000-2009 sometime in January/February

I really hope Pitchfork redeems themselves with the Top 200 Albums on Sept. 28th

7 comments:

Monique said...

REAL DUMB. Real bad...

Jason Kirk said...

By my count, 29 of the 38 artists you have a problem with are non-white. Seems a little high.

tim_g said...

yeah, you hate rap & rnb - so that means no list shld include them?? ok

Mike said...

It isnt about them being non-white or Rap/R&B...it's about the fact that these songs were not culturally relevant/important spanning the past decade. I can think of at least twenty songs off the top of my head that deserve to be on this, example: Young Jeezy - "My President is Black",The Game - "The Documentary", Lil' Wayne - "Gossip", etc. Their list was obviously bias to NYC king Jay-Z and his lady Beyonce. I'm just saying their list totally fucking sucked because it was so far from being a true accounting of the last decade in music.

tim_g said...

ok just for an e.g -

12: OutKast - "Hey Ya!"
11: Gnarls Barkley - "Crazy"
7: Missy Elliott - "Get Ur Freak On"
4: Beyonce - "Crazy in Love (Feat. Jay-Z)"
1: OutKast - "B.O.B."

yr saying these songs were not culturally relevant/important??

i mean ---- what???

Mike said...

Okay...I guess I should have been more precise. Minus "Crazy in Love", I think all of those songs arguably deserve a spot in the top 500...BUT, none of those should even touch the top 100 songs of 2000-2009. You can expect me to believe that "Bombs Over Baghdad" is a legit #1? I think Pitchfork wants to look like they enjoy pop-hop/R&B way more than the rest of because it makes them seem culturally advanced in someway. Bottom line...this list is by no means an accurate representation of the best 500 songs to be released in this decade, ESPECIALLY the majority of the top 10 songs. The list is a joke and I am not in the minority of holding that opinion.

noisefl00r said...

i completely agree. i was so pissed when i stayed up to see what the final picks were and it was that shit. i mean seriously, my lip gloss is poppin? come on. and 'Maps' by YYY's is a classic song but it does not deserve #6 on the list. this whole thing was bullshit